Cohort Two: Emotional Regulation

 

All times listed in PST (Los Angeles, California time zone)

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Announcing a second round of Cohort Two for Asia & Australia-friendly time zones - Begins April 11, 2025!

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Format: 4-week live cohort (Fridays, 5pm-8pm PST)
5:00 - 5:30 PM → Masterclass Part 1 (Teaching concepts, interactive lecture)
5:30 - 5:50 PM → Live Demo (Kim models a skill with a volunteer)
5:50 - 6:00 PM → Break (10 min)
6:00 - 7:00 PM → Masterclass Part 2 (Deepening the concept with application)
7:00 - 7:30 PM → Practice Lab (Partnered & solo exercises)
7:30 - 8:00 PM → Q&A + Midweek Practice Exercises

 

Week 1: Understanding Emotional Dysregulation & Your Triggers

 

Masterclass Part 1:

• Why emotions overwhelm us: Understanding the nervous system’s role in emotional hijacking and why some emotions feel impossible to control.

• The “Trap” of triggered responses (Gabor Maté): How emotional reactivity is a survival pattern set long ago—and how to deconstruct it with compassionate curiosity.

• How trauma affects memory and regulation (Janina Fisher): Why the brain can’t store memories and regulate emotions in survival mode—and how this impacts real-time reactivity.

• Right brain vs. left brain in trauma storage: Why logical thinking fails during emotional overwhelm and how to integrate suppressed emotions using both hemispheres.

Live Demo:

• Kim models how to track physical and emotional shifts before escalation.

• A volunteer shares an emotional stressor, and Kim demonstrates how to slow it down, identify the trigger part, and notice body cues.

Masterclass Part 2:

• Tracking physiological distress signals: Recognizing early signs like body tension, voice changes, and shallow breath before losing control.

• Explicit vs. implicit memory (Gabor Maté): How unprocessed emotional “blueprints” from past experiences hijack current reactions—and why most memories of conflict are distorted.

• When shame blocks emotional repair: How deep shame leads to reactivity and prevents vulnerability—and how to weaken shame through connection and self-compassion.

• Introduction to “Parts Work” (IFS): Recognizing the protective “parts” that hijack your emotions and prevent self-regulation.

Practice Lab:

• Partnered Option:

  • Identifying Emotional Triggers: One partner shares a past reaction while the other helps them slow down and track patterns.

  • Body Scan & Somatic Awareness: Practice noticing where tension and activation show up in the body during stress.

  • Roadmap for Processing Dysregulation: Learn a step-by-step approach to working through emotional reactivity in real time.

• Solo Option:

  • Journaling Prompt:

    • Describe a moment of emotional overwhelm.

    • What triggered it?

    • What were your body’s distress signals?

    • How did you react?

    • Self-Guided Body Scan: Record yourself scanning the body and naming where tension lingers after stress.

 

Q&A + Midweek Practice:

• Midweek Practice:

• Track emotional shifts before escalation.

• Notice what body signals showed up during stress.

• Try a somatic tool (grounding, breathwork) to calm your nervous system.

• Accountability Partner: Pair up for a midweek check-in on emotional tracking and regulation practice.

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Week 2: From Reactivity to Response—Interrupting Emotional Hijacks

 

Masterclass Part 1:

• Why logic disappears in emotional hijacks: Understanding amygdala activation and how the brain’s survival response overrides clear thinking.

• Shame-based triggers and protector parts: How shame activates fight/flight/freeze/fawn behaviors and why protector parts hijack your response to avoid vulnerability.

• Window of Tolerance: How to identify when you’re inside or outside your regulation zone—and why expanding this window is key to emotional control.

Live Demo:

• Kim works with a participant to model a common escalation scenario (e.g., partner criticism) and demonstrates how to insert a pause before reacting.
  A volunteer practices managing impulsively using grounding and pause techniques.

Masterclass Part 2:

• Tracking micro-shifts before escalation: How to notice early warning signs of dysregulation in the body (e.g., breath, tension, posture).

• The “Pause Practice”: Creating space between stimulus and response without avoiding or shutting down.

• Narrative brain in triggers: How your brain tells stories during emotional overwhelm—and how to challenge those stories with compassionate logic.

• Relational impact of reactivity: How unregulated responses affect connection and trust—and how pausing supports secure relationships.

Practice Lab:

• Partnered Option:

  • Map Your Emotional Reactivity: Identify your default fight/flight/freeze/fawn response and share a recent trigger.

  • Slow-Motion Roleplay: Re-enact the moment, pausing at key points to regulate and respond differently.

  • Co-Regulation Drill: Practice grounding and breathing together before responding.

• Solo Option:

  • Journaling Prompt:

    • Describe a time you reacted impulsively.

    • What emotions and body cues took over?

    • What would have changed if you had paused?

    • Guided Self-Practice: Record yourself recounting a past emotional reaction, deliberately pausing to slow the experience and reflect.

Q&A + Midweek Practice:

• Midweek Practice: Track moments when you reacted vs. paused.

• Video Reflection Exercise: Record a 1-minute video describing a recent reaction—notice tone, breath, pacing.

 

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Week 3: Communicating Through Overwhelm — Mirroring, Triggers & Repair

 

Masterclass Part 1:

• Why listening shuts down during conflict: understanding threat perception and emotional flooding

• How shame and protector parts block connection and fuel defensiveness

• Mirroring as a nervous system tool: the science and relational impact of feeling seen

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Live Demo:

• Mirroring in an Emotional Conversation

  • Kim models how to mirror tone, body language, and language in a dysregulated conversation. A volunteer shares an emotionally charged situation, and Kim demonstrates live mirroring techniques to calm the system and build connection.

 

Masterclass Part 2:

• What to do when others can't mirror you back

• Conflict repair after reactivity: reconnecting after you've shut down, snapped, or escalated

• Reparenting and containment tools for emotionally unsafe dynamics

• How to co-regulate when the other person doesn’t meet you

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Practice Lab:

• Partnered Option:

  • Practice mirroring in emotionally charged, non-partnered topics

  • “Fix-it Later” roleplay using mirroring as a repair strategy

  • Co-regulation + containment: identifying what helps bring you back to connection

• Solo Option:

  • Voice Note Re-enactment: Record your dysregulated response, then re-record how you would respond from a grounded state

  • Parts Mapping: Identify protector parts that arise in conflict and explore their purpose

  • Mirror Work: Make eye contact with yourself while practicing self-compassionate phrases

  • “What I Wish I Could Say” Letter: Express unspoken feelings to someone who can’t mirror you

  • Post-Conflict Debrief Worksheet: Process a recent emotional trigger and reflect on how repair could look

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Q&A + Midweek Practice:

• Midweek Self-Awareness Challenge: Notice your protectors in real time—what do they say, feel like, and try to do?

• Practice mirroring or containment strategies in one real-life conversation

Week 4: Emotional Mastery—Integration & Emotional Rescue Planning

Turning Insight Into Practice – Building Your Personalized Roadmap

 

Masterclass Part 1: What Happens After Regulation?

• Why emotional regulation is the beginning—not the end—of healing

• Self-compassion vs. self-indulgence: How to hold yourself accountable with kindness

• How triggers point to unmet needs, legacy burdens, and unspoken fears

• Engaging the prefrontal cortex to rewrite internal narratives and reclaim agency

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Live Demo: Self-Compassion After a Trigger

• Kim walks through a real-time self-compassion and repair sequence using parts mapping and body-based regulation

• Demonstration of how to soothe the protector, engage curiosity, and plan a new behavioral response

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Masterclass Part 2: The Emotional Rescue Plan

• How to create a personalized roadmap for future triggers

• Identifying your emotional lens and understanding your protector’s job

• Mapping triggers → body signals → regulation tools → intentional repair

• How childhood can hold the key to effective tools for self-soothing

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Practice Lab: Build Your Personal Emotional Rescue Plan

• Mapping triggers and understanding their root cause

• Track what happens in your body

• Using somatic anchors for your nervous system

• Create a self-compassion script

• Complete a one-page rescue plan template

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Q&A + Final Reflections

• Integration and closure: What are you taking with you?

• What shifted for you most over the last 4 weeks?

• Final community share and invitation to continue your practice

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